Deep Dark Fears

7Mar

Is It You?

I am 23 and from a small town. I don’t like this place. I feel congested here, some horrid memories of the past. Is it you? I don’t want to go back, so it’s a good thing we are now moving to a new place.

Last night, we settled in this new place. It looks beautiful, but a strange thing happened to me. A girl in white clothes was standing in front of me in my room. I put a blanket on my face, but as soon as I uncovered my face, there she was, standing and staring at me. I think I know her, but I might be wrong. This is plain bullshit. I guess those old boring stories about a woman in white are getting into my head. Read More »

3Oct

The Perfect Woman

Nobody is perfect. I wanted to have the perfect companion in the world but found none. All were lacking in one respect or another. I have a picture in my mind of the kind I crave. I am still relentlessly working on finding one.

I don’t have many friends. The closest ones I hang out with are Alisha, Ruby, Zarine and Anahita. There is a high level of trust among us. After college, we usually mess around discovering new places and new elements. It has its amusement and excitement in knowing the unknown. Some fortunate days we found few of the rare crystals from the sea nearby. Not me! I don’t know how to swim, and neither do the rest three of us. It is Alisha who can. She is the best diver I have ever seen, better than an expert. She can hold her breath for as long as seven minutes and can go deep undersea without any fear. It is the blessing of her ability that she got such a perfect athletic frame. I have seen many in my college drooling over her. However, she trusts no one but me. I never lie to her about anything, but I don’t like the way she behaves. It is not okay to disrespect any other person, though I agree that this is not the case with me, but she never omitted to being insolent. Read More »

30Sep

I Must See – The Dominion

Day 5

As I am writing this, my eyes are already heavy. I was not like this. I have never failed so severely in my life. I was one of the ingenious men who could simplify any arduous task. I have lost my ability with time. All I now see is gloom. I have lost my purpose. I have lost my companions, I have lost my love, and most importantly I have lost myself. Whenever I look into the mirror, I can’t even find any similarity between the man in the mirror and me. Any staring into his eyes more than half a second sends me into the depth of Tartarus. I am scared of myself. I need to call out to someone for help. The Power, I call it Dominion. I believe in it. I believe that I can take help from it. Powers stronger than black magic or white magic, and beyond any sorcery, witchcraft or necromancy. Beyond the powers of good and evil, a supreme power vests in the invisible. Whosoever sees it, can sense it, feel it! Difficulty lies in making yourself capable of seeing it, not through eyes but mind. Not even a single man has ever made it to the end of the process. The process that requires far more mental and physical strength and endurance than a mortal is blessed with. Read More »

28Sep

Happy Birthday to Me

Today is 24th of September; yesterday was my birthday. On the 22nd at 10, when I went to bed, I felt that someone was present in my room. Before it happened, I was hearing eerie noises like if someone was turning on his PC with windows XP on it. You know how it sounds; that long monotonous creepy tone never failed to give me chills. That day I went to bed early; I had no work to do. I had been alone in the past few days. I had no friends, I was alone almost all the time, talking to myself, apprehending myself, loathing and loving myself, and all those feelings that an ordinary human being shares with another being. I had to do it all by myself. Not until the day when I first met you. Alisha, I didn’t pay any particular attention to you in the library where we used to visit until one day when you cooked my iPhone by spilling your damn coffee on it. I never loved anything more than my iShit, but that was the first time I was not infuriated. Instead, I offered you another coffee and from that day onwards we got along well. Good were those days; I never felt so alone as I am feeling now, but thank God you are here with me, looking at me. Are you hearing what I am saying? Read More »

25Sep

The Eyes of Jeannie

I have to tell you this; I wouldn’t if it were not so deeply related to my heart but to my mind. I lived with my dearest one, Jeannie. She was as beautiful as a mortal could possibly be, as beautiful as a thread of light, as beautiful as the dawn, ineffable. As the opposite, I was dull, lacked vigor and lived in recluse in a cloister. I was addicted to crystal meth to compensate the loneliness. When I saw her the first time, it was neither with my eyes nor with my heart, but with my attracted mind. Not toward her beauty, but her eyes. Her dark blue eyes were holding all the elixir of life, all the knowledge one could have. Through those dark shimmers, one could see the loneliness, the desire and the love buried. Its shield of lashes, brushing her cheeks and protecting the shimmers every time she blinked, I wished I would’ve had them. Read More »

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